¹Why is it that some people who have confidence [trust] in what they know don’t get labeled as being arrogant, but then others with the same type of self-assurance end up being disrespected?
I’ve heard people say, “If you don’t value yourself, no one else will either.” It’s odd how those same people, who think that way, cannot see their hypocrisy once someone finally applies such advice into his life.
Maybe I’m wrong, but what I’ve noticed is that those people who have always portrayed a high esteem of self, never get questioned. It’s as if it’s simply accepted because that healthy self-esteem has always been there.
But take someone that’s grown up with a corroded sense of self, whose self-esteem finally takes a turn for the better; s/he ends up perceived as being conceited.
I think I may have just figured out why that is now! After having looked up the word conceited, I noticed from it being defined as having an exaggerated sense of self-importance, the word exaggerated is relative and not absolute!
When something is absolute, it means it does not depend on anything else and it’s beyond human control. Relative is the antonym of absolute; it depends on something else and it is within human control (kind of like opinions are). Relative means to be properly related in size or degree or other measurable characteristics; usually followed by `to.’
Well, given the above information now, I can see why it is that someone who has been known to have an insecure esteem of self (especially if it’s an extremely insecure one!) would be judged as being arrogant and/or conceited when that esteem does a turn-around! People get the perception that the changed person (who has a new and different value of self) now has an exaggerated sense of self-importance because they are comparing that person as they once knew him or her with how they now are seeing that person being!
If what I’ve just said isn’t bad enough, add to that fact this other one:
Aspie people are misjudged by neurotypicals as being arrogant because aspies do not have the same social values as NTs do. Typical people are insulted by those who have a rigid facial expression and monotone voice. They misinterpret that to be a personally directed non-verbal message telling them they’re boring and/or inferior. This wouldn’t be a problem if they weren’t so proud and/or ignorant. Proof of this comes from how animals react differently to aspies. Animals don’t care if a person plasters on a big smile to his mask and/or talks in a theatrical fashion. They happily accept an aspie so long as s/he isn’t abusive.
So, this means that the chances are whenever someone thinks somebody else is conceited and/or arrogant, especially if that particular guy or gal didn’t used to be the way that he or she now is, the one who is really arrogant is the one who is making an opinion based on his or her own exaggerated sense of self-importance! That kind of pride blinds the eye of the beholder from seeing what s/he’s really doing when s/he thinks like that.
