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What’s next?

  • Posted on March 24, 2008

Who came up with the notion to list an intense concern for privacy as being an Asperger characteristic? Do I look like I have an ‘intense’ concern for privacy?

The only way I can see how someone might be tempted to allege such things is if that person was an ‘authority figure’ probing an Aspergian with questions who is unwilling to ‘play the game.’

There are enough Aspergians publicly available now to dispel the myth of there being a correlation between concern for privacy and how a brain is hard-wired neurologically.

In these times we now live in, most people don’t understand others who don’t have an intense concern for privacy. I think the pot is calling the kettle black in this case. Anyone know of some licensed mental health professionals or, for that matter, a branch of government who/that doesn’t have an intense concern for their/its privacy?

If any correlations are to be noticed, the one I see is a general trend for neurotypical people to try and pry into others’ lives (gossip for example) while hiding behind masks to desperately not reveal their actual selves. Aspergians however are usually the ‘what you see is what you get’ kind of people.

Weary Time

  • Posted on March 24, 2008

I’m showing this for a particular person,
but it’s also for anyone else to view:

Inkblock

A woodblock carving I did in 1982.

Climber

An ink print from that carving.

Write On?

  • Posted on March 24, 2008

I admire people who can write smoothly with a free-flowing style that seems natural! I recently read in William Zinsser’s book On Writing Well that this is one of the most difficult things to do. I also became enlightened of how writing non-fiction is more difficult than fiction. I never attempted fiction, so I have no clue as to how hard that is.

Another bit of new information I’ve gathered came from some rare feedback my husband graciously provided. He was under the delusion that I enjoy writing because I write in a blog. Poor guy . . . I had no idea that’s what he thought. If he thought that, then I would imagine other people do too. This is why I feel I should probably set some misperceptions straight in regards to a few misleading things.

Here is a great example of why I don’t enjoy writing:

Zinsser has confused me as to what exactly an ‘over the fence’ style of writing is. I barely understand how it annoys people, especially since I enjoy reading what people write when I feel like they’re talking to me. I totally comprehend how irritating being verbose is, but I’m sure that only those people who battle nightmarish levels of indecision realize how hard it is to separate what is ‘garbage’ from what is ‘enriching.’ Add to that, being highly sensitive towards ‘corrections’ that are blunt versus candid doesn’t help. Do people realize that there are some folks who have lived with just about nothing other than criticism and almost never have received encouragement? Imagine if all you heard throughout your life was, “You know what your problem is . . . ?”

No, this is not a call to solicit pity. It’s an awareness post to let my readers know why I write in spite of hating to do so. If I did not write, I would feel like I do not exist as a human being. I have no offline social life.¹ I can’t.² My blog is my ‘life jacket’ to stay afloat in this world. Because I can write (no, I’m not claiming that I write well), I must write. I have things to say that will destroy me if I keep them inside any longer. If people don’t want to read what I say, that’s totally fine by me. I understand, especially so knowing how arrogant I sound sometimes. I would delete the posts I wrote that make me cringe, but I leave them here because it’s the real me (plus, for me to decide what to keep versus editing and/or deleting would be hell).

These very words happening right now seem both self-centered and thoughtful. I’m writing about myself, but what I’m trying to say is being done with thoughtful intentions. Everyone is born with talents and a purpose in life. I have not learned what my talents are yet, but I am vaguely beginning to get a sense of my purpose in life. As much as probably many might think so, my purpose in life does NOT involve me keeping my mouth shut. However, I admit I run ahead of God’s will before realizing when I’m doing so. Those are probably my arrogant moments . . . but then we all have them now and then (some more than others).

¹I’ve tried all throughout my life, but I’m finally giving up. It’s best for everyone. I have a few acquaintances and I’m content with that. Plus, I now know that the best gift I can give to others is to leave them alone.

²The two people who know me the most in person agree that it is not possible for any person to know me unless they are forced to do so. They said it takes a lifetime to comprehend me. A decade or so begins the process, but that merely is a tip of the iceberg. Others agree with them. If anyone has read my claim, “I’m probably the most easily misunderstood person around,” please don’t think it was said lightly.

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