It’s because of my sensitivities that I had to choose the ’symptom’ and asperger characteristic of strong sensitivity to sound, light, some tastes, odors and colors today. If I picked a different asperger issue to counter-balance the massive amount of misinformation circulating through the media, my anger level would escalate too high.
I doubt most people realize how difficult it is for someone, such as my ‘aspie’ self, to endure watching documentaries filmed on the topic of autism. I won’t mention which one I viewed today, but I will say it lasted 93 minutes and 52 seconds. It did cover the issue of sensitivity to sound and light, but practically nothing was said about autistics’ sensitivities with taste, odor, or color. That’s no big deal.
What is bad however is the way that people are reacting towards autism and autistics. Watching so-called ‘educational’ videos on this topic reminds me of a bunch of hens running around a hen-house in a panic without knowing where the fox is. There is no way to ’sugar coat’ this — the ignorance level of a lot of the people who are putting themselves in charge ‘helping’ autistic children (especially the Asperger syndrome/high-functioning autistics) is scary.
Why don’t these people incorporate the help that ‘well-aged’ adults, who are either Aspies or on the high end of the autism spectrum, can give them? Doesn’t this missing ingredient raise any red-flags for anyone? . . . or are people to dull and/or proud to notice?
My heart breaks when I see the way that adults in these documentaries try to ‘train’ autistic children! It’s obvious to me they don’t know what they’re doing.¹ Some of them at least are getting a vague ‘connection’ pulling them into the right direction when they allow their children to teach them something. The reason these children can’t teach anyone else other than their parents is because no one else really cares to know! People may pretend, but if they are, they’re most likely doing it for whatever money they can grab for themselves by taking advantage of a situation.
How long will it take for people to wake up and see that it is not the children who need to change, but rather society’s perception of them? One mother summed it up perfectly! She said her daughter taught her that there was NOTHING wrong with her daughter, but rather the problem was that society would never VALUE her daughter . . . even though her daughter has aspects about herself that have value which society could benefit from.
Heightened sensitivity itself is a value when used in the proper channels. Is it necessary to say what advantages a person has, who is able to discern more subtle sounds, tastes, odors, colors, lights, movement, details, etc. with greater accuracy, than someone who is less sensitive in these areas?
If we know that you can’t put a round peg into a square hole, then why do people believe it is possible to fit autistic children into mainstream schools? Since it’s obvious there are enough neuro-A-typical children in society that would benefit from schools specifically geared to their style of learning, the whole idea of trying to make mainstream schools accommodate their needs is absurd!
The problem however that would crop up with schools specializing in teaching students on the autism spectrum would be keeping out the greedy foxes that sneak in. The television media is already feeding them, along with big businesses such as: Starbucks, Toys ‘R Us, and Build-A-Bear Workshop. I spot quite a few of these ‘bad apples’ sitting in at asperger conventions. It’s easy for me to tell who they are by the way they ‘talk down’ to me as if I’m inferior. If I’m not supposed to be sensitive about that, then I say, “Oh well . . . good luck everyone because you’re going to need it!”
¹I’m talking about the general long-term consequences more than anything. The process is slow and subtle; one step at a time.
Codeman38, if only others could see what we see and know what we know. Since they can’t though, that’s all the more reason they should look at what we have to tell them.
Thanks for adding a the link! I hope many people will read what’s there with caution. If people want to call something ‘diseased,’ it’s the egos of those who try to force someone to look at their eyes while speaking.
When I watched the documentary, I’d cringe over how nasty the attitudes these people would have with children who were trying their best to comply. What do people think that children are? . . . robots that you can program?
I feel overwhelmed too and might need to take a break. It’s nice to know that folks like us can keep ‘the ball rolling’ when we work as a team.
Normal sure is overrated! What’s the matter with people? They want to be unique AND normal!
Alex,
Thank you for your words of encouragement! There are too many who are discouraging; it’s time for us to speak now. Sooner or later, people will realize what we have to offer. I’m glad you and Katie know how to get out there and be heard!
If this is the documentary I’m thinking of, the scene that I found so incredibly frustrating was when a therapist was forcing one of the children, against his will, to stare her in the eye, when it was painfully clear that he found it incredibly uncomfortable to do so. And I’ve seen similar things happen in other documentary-type footage on nightly news programs whenever they decide to cover the topic of autism.
It’s like nobody ever considers the fact that, just perhaps, eye contact might be interpreted differently in autistic children– like, for instance, as a sign of threat…
Oh, yes, that was another thing that bugged me.
On a related note, I really need to start posting to my autism blog again; one of the whole reasons I created it was to share things from my perspective for the benefit of NTs who might find it useful. But I haven’t updated it in aeons, because I’ve just been so utterly overwhelmed this past couple semesters. :-/
+++I really liked what you said about people needing to incorporate help from adults on the spectrum. As autistics, we have the perspective of actually having gone through a lot of the same issues.
Marla,
You can watch Autism: The Musical online for a limited time. As glad as you might be reading my perspective on it, I’m more glad to hear how everything is changing for you and your daughter! Your daughter is fortunate to have you for her mom!
I am pretty sure I know the movie you are talking about. I have not seen it and probably won’t until I can Net Flix it. It has been a frenzy of blogging activity…that is for sure. I am glad to read your perspective on it.
I used to be one of the moms forcing my daughter to look me in the eye a lot. It was what I was taught to do and then in time I fired most of the people telling me what to do with my daughter. They had no clue.
I also am guilty of trying many different methods to help her that were not good. I think a lot of parents go through this phase and then “wake up” and see that they are handling things in a very intrusive fashion. Like many things that is a process parents tend to go through. The quicker they go through it the better for all involved, especially the child.
Every day I have to remind myself to let M be who she is and not force her to be what I think she should be. I learn so much from reading the blogs written by people who have the same sensitivities as her. It has changed everything for me and how I relate to my daughter. For the better.
Sarah,
I don’t mean to paint a picture of hopelessness and/or complete worthlessness with any school. Just like nothing is perfect, nothing is perfectly imperfect either. We all know all good things take a lot of time. That’s why it’s all the more important to not go backwards or in the wrong direction.
laurentius-rex,
Your hypersensitivity appears to even reveal joy in the way your write — doesn’t sound like you’re suffering too much from autism; it’s more like a thrill ride that lasts a lifetime!
Why do I agree with the consensus that I am autistic?
T’aint cos of the social and the triad bollox, no way , cos as is the sensory business, I have always been hypersensitive and do remain so to my gladness. You cannot take it away from me, for thought a loud sound like a fire engine or ambulance can literally paralyse me tis me joy to hear what others can’t and the wierd sensory interconnection of my vision too, that sees a world so bright it burns.
My particular take on autism is that it is the sensory and perceptual differences that really mark us out, but they have been sidelined and ignored for the most part in the way in which autism has been codified and conceptualised.
I am glad and I really do joy to the fact that I do not see the world as the majority of the world do (as it is said) see it I am a visionary and I cannot but express my joy at the world of images that I experience.
I agree with many of your comments about the documentary, but disagree with your comments about mainstream education. There is some value in special schools under the current imperfect system, but I don’t think segregation is or should be a long-term solution. Ideally schools definitely should accommodate all students, and clearly they don’t at the present time. (This includes more than just neuro-atypical kids.) I don’t think “schools for neuro-atypical” are the ideal solution, because that’s a diverse group of people, too. All autistic people do not learn alike, and not all “neurotypical” people learn alike, either. That’s why education should become more individualized, for everyone. That was one point which the documentary drew out nicely, as the boy Wyatt was clearly unhappy and probably not being challenged enough in special education, while Lexi’s mother commented that her special education classes didn’t seem to be recognizing her value and strength. I know there are many wonderful “autistics-only” schools out there, but I think it’s a mistake to give up on mainstream education altogether. Moreover, many autism spectrum schools do use some degree of behavioral techniques, I believe. I don’t know if you’ve read the book “Asparagus Dreams” by Jessica Peers, but it’s an interesting account of a live-in autism school. Frankly I doubt whether she was truly being academically challenged in such an environment, and I do think that’s a valid concern. Even though it was far from perfect, I’m glad I was put in honors classes and given high expectations.
You’re welcome Marla.
Wow! Thank you. I will watch the movie online!