It was inevitable to me that there exists a level at which it becomes impossible to explain how neurotypicals and aspies both lack theory of mind. As this gap of understanding decreases between me and my NT daughter (who is now an adult), we increasingly begin to see how hopeless it is for others to ever grasp knowing what she and I now know.
I was going to go deeper into explaining how misjudgments happen by writing another post using examples. I thank God I asked for my daughter’s opinion on whether or not I should publish the post I wrote earlier today (it’s now deleted and will stay that way). My gut feeling was telling me not to do it, but my good intentions where saying otherwise.
After sharing with my daughter what I planned to write about, she knew she had to tell me things that she didn’t want to share. She knew it would hurt my feelings deeply, but she also knew that if I didn’t get this information, I could not realize how incapable and/or how unwilling readers (relatives and acquaintances included) would be to understand what I was trying to explain.¹
I gave her my word that I would not tell anyone what she shared with me. Because such privacy is necessary, it confirms just about everything I had suspected throughout my life. It’s unbelievable how ironic the whole situation is turning out with learning about how differently neurotypicals think versus how aspies think.
The more that my daughter and I gain knowledge that has the potential to help others, the more we’re able to see how this would backfire against us because of the ignorance level which exists in society and the cognitive inability most people have. She and I can continue to become closer from what we can teach each other, because fate has created a way for us to be beyond a level unable to be attained by humanistic means.
If what I’m saying here sounds confusing, I apologize. I would love more than anything for aspergers to be understood correctly, but now I see I’ve reached a point at which it is best I go no further (deeper) with talking about it.
Feeling as hurt as I do now (by knowing what I know) has knocked the wind out of my sail for sure. Without motivation, it is time for me to move on to other things outside of those related to the autism spectrum.
With that being said, should my blog remain on the Autism Hub and BlogNetNews.com/Autism or should it be taken off?² If it is off, then how will people know about all that I’ve written so far on the topic of Aspergers? If it is on the hub, then my blog could be misleading if readers are unaware of the buried posts related to Aspergers.
¹I’m not referring to what I’ve already written in my blog. I am talking about things I have not mentioned. They are things which the public is unaware of and impacts families and society to a greater degree.
²As of June 2010, my blog is no longer on the Autism Hub.
